SEO, SSL, Google, Alexa, website ranking and who is telling the Truth?

Holy shit, it’s 2017 and I haven’t written a blog in a long ass time. Trump is the president, the Earth might end in 2 years, and I still can’t figure out why Seattle drivers don’t like to “zipper” merge on the freeway.

At any rate, let’s get down to the new SSL trend that affects Search Engine Optimization (SEO).  Yes, a Secure Socket Layer (SSL) will increase your security for e-Commerce websites and site that require sensitive information like a credit card info, username, and password but does it affect SEO ranking. Well, What the hell is SEO? In short, Search engines like Google, Yahoo and Bing use use crawlers to find pages for their algorithmic search results. How does this differ from rank. Well rank is popularity and how well it ranks over other websites.  To be honest, this is really boring shit but Google announced that they found “positive results” with SSL websites versus non-SSL websites but this can be debatable (2014).

I helped configure a website that has no SSL but ranks higher over a large website with an SSL. As far as the search engine goes, that is dependent on the keyword variable and what’s considered good SEO or “Valuable Content” that affects Google’s site performance in their search engine.

Here’s the proof as of March 8, 2017.  These SEO results can change in the future.


So This is a company called FANTA. They make soft drinks and use an SSL on their site. If Coca Cola had a cousin that liked to go the beach everyday, their name would be Fanta. This taste alright if you mix it with small amounts of Vodka or white rum.


This is the Cooking chicks- She’s a blogger, cooks good food and shares her recipes online. FANTA is a “super tiny bit” more popular than her recipes but let’s talk about the SSL and ranking.




Ok now here comes the fun part.  According to Alexa, Fanta with the SSL and reputation of being a popular soft drink owned by Coca Cola, they rank 429,653* in the United States. *(figures may change in the future- last update March 8, 2017)



So how about the Cookin Chicks* ranking? Well, no SSL and not owned by Coca Cola but let’s see if quality content makes a difference?   *(figures may change in the future- last update March 8, 2017)



Hmmm!? Could Alexa be wrong? Do you trust, that is  owned my Amazon, could these be Alternative Facts? Does a website rank even mean anything? Could you rank lower in popularity and still make a lot more money and revenue than something that is less popular with a lower ranking? I don’t know let’s ask Donald Trump? He knows everything.  Is SEO different from Ranking? Have a “high SEO and low ranking” or “low SEO and high ranking” or vice versa?  I don’t know a lot about SEO since I didn’t get my SEO or Bullshit degree at Harvard or Trump University. I know this because using “curse/swear words lowers your ranking on Google but that’s why I’m terrible at SEO but I can’t stop, my fingers stop typing FUCK- ah – the urge!  So does the end justify the means?


What is the business model? Does a website generate revenue or is it purely to have to show that you exist online? Or is it used only so you can sign up for a Facebook business page or some other social networking site. And who the fuck goes to the Fanta site. I mean, I usually youtube or something else to watch a fun or creative commercial.    Unless someone in the creative marketing department want to improve sales, they can come up some cool shit to make it happen without relying on website ranking or SEO. Does it apply to the context of the product and service or “trying to hard to go viral?” The marketing of the product doesn’t work or matter that much if the product won’t sell on its own.  I think the most effective tool for marketing is a combination of media and word of mouth, once again- the test marketing episode on Southpark was on point.  Especially video games. I’ve noticed  the most popular items usually go under the radar without some fucking dumb shit marketing sales consultant circle jerking off about how to market their next big thing with cluster fucks of advertising on billboards. There are lots of example where advertising wasn’t the main factor: Pokémon GO,  Harry Potter, Cards against Humanity, Sriracha, Facebook (when it started),  Internet Memes…and much more? Why? cause its fun and it doesn’t suck.